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Dear Robbeyond, 

I am one of those people who become very depressed during the holidays.  I am single, my family lives far away and I always find myself alone for the holidays.  Christmas and New Years eve are especially difficult.  Each year I tell myself I am going to do something wonderful and each year it comes up so quickly that I find myself alone and watching tv. The part that bothers me the most is that I lie to my co-workers and friends about my holiday plans because I am so ashamed that I am alone. 

Roy T.

Dear Roy,

You have several options in this situation.  One is to embrace your single life and treat yourself to wonderful things around the holiday.  Buy yourself a little something that you want, make your favorite foods and maybe even save up that movie you wanted to see all year.  The second option is to seek out people who are in the same situation, you are not alone, there are many single people out there who are in the same situation.  You can volunteer at a shelter or soup kitchen or a host of other organizations, they all need help during the holidays.  This connectiveness will help to not feel isolated.  Another option is to plan ahead, plan a trip, either a vacation or visit friends or relatives.  Do not be afraid to put yourself out there, let people know you are looking for something to do for the holidays.  If you extend yourself you may be rewarded with gracious hospitality.

RB